We live in 2021 and yet it is still very hard to talk about our mental health issues . I myself have been struggling with mental health issues my whole adult life.
And I know why I feel it is so hard to talk about, and I want to share the most common reasons it is so hard to talk about mental health issues with you. I hope it will give you some understanding for yourself and the people that you care for that are struggling. Know you are not alone.
Common reasons it is hard to talk about mental health issues.
1. Shame
Maybe this is the most common reason why many of us don’t talk about our mental health issues. We feel ashamed. Especially when we live a “good” life.
Which means, you seem to have it all. Yet you don’t feel like it. And you feel ashamed that you feel the way you feel. You don’t think you should. And you blame yourself for it and beat yourself up for it. All making it worse.
A feeling of loneliness kicks in. And you feel nobody will understand you. You can also feel shame for your own thoughts and feelings. And you fear people will judge you for them.
2. Fear of not being taken seriously
Talking about your emotions and feelings is very scary. Even more so when you don’t think people will understand you. You are afraid they will judge you for your feelings and you even worry they don’t think it’s that bad.
They might tell you to just stop feeling like that and enjoy life a little more and just stop stressing out. You, and I, know it’s not that simple. And it can be very difficult to explain this to others that are not in a similar situation.
And because they are not in a similar situation, we fear they will not take us seriously and will downplay our feelings.
3. You don’t want to worry other people
Sometimes your feelings and thoughts can be very dark. You even scare yourself with it and you feel your loved ones will worry too much about you when you tell them.
It feels safer to keep it to yourself. Worrying other people is one of the worst feelings you can have when you struggle with your mental health issues. That’s why people tend to isolate themselves when they experience dark thoughts.
4. Be a burden to others
Same as worrying others, being a burden is not something you want to feel. And yet, it is something people that struggle mentally feel a lot.
It’s very common to feel like your problems only are a burden to others, that you are a burden. And everything would be easier for everyone if you weren’t around.
It’s a very big fear that a lot of people have. Please know, that you are never ever a burden to others.
5. Afraid to be made fun of and being left out
When you pour your heart out, telling your deepest secrets and most emotional and darkest thoughts, it is one of your biggest fears you will be made fun of.
You feel people will joke about your mental health issues, mocking you. Maybe not to your face, but definitely behind your back.
You feel people will not want to hang out with you anymore because you are “that one with the issues”. And not that fun to be around.
Obviously, this is not true. But you can’t help to feel it despite that.
6. Get advice you don’t want and need
People have the best intentions when they give you advice. But after the 100th time your aunt told you to just “be happy” or “just stop thinking like that” or “just do something fun”. You kind of had enough of advice.
Also when you are in a very sensitive and influenceable mindset, getting all kinds of advice of people who are not experienced with the situation can be very stressful.
You keep changing your mind by all the advice you get. And you want to avoid this, so you choose to just not talk about it.
7. Feeling of failure
When you talk about your mental health issues, you are confirming them to others. And to yourself. It can make you feel like you failed in life.
Why do you have these problems? Other people seem to be so happy, but why me? Life should have been different at this point, and you feel you failed.
And you don’t want to feel this feeling so it’s easier to pretend it’s not there.
8. Talking about your mental health issues makes it more real
When you said it. You can’t take it back. Your safe secrets are out in the open. And being out in the open, it feels so much more real. It’s hard enough to deal with your mental health issues in your own world. But to deal with it so publicly, when you have told your loved ones, it’s way more scary and real.
9. You can’t hide anymore
Besides making your problems more real, you also can’t really hide anymore when you have told your problems. Now “everybody” knows and you can’t pretend anymore that the problems are not real. When you say you are “okay”, some people will question this. And you don’t want to deal with that all the time.
10. Pressure
When you told your loved ones about your mental health issues you feel pressured. You think people will expect you to work on yourself all the time and you should get help. You can feel forced to seek help. And you want to do it all in your own time, when you are ready.
11. Talking and explaining about your mental health issues all the time
Yes, you have mental health issues. But that is not all you are. You are afraid people will only see that part of you. Afraid that people want to talk about it all the time. And you have to explain how and why you feel the way you feel. With the chance you don’t even know yourself why you do, this is very hard for you and why it is easier to not talk about your issues.
These were the reasons that make it hard for me to talk about my mental health issues
I think that a lot of people can relate. I think it is important to talk and share these things. Just know you are not alone, and it is okay to seek help and talk about it. What makes it hard for you to talk about your mental health issues? Let me know in the comments.
I wrote another post about why you should NOT be afraid to talk about your mental health issues, please read this when you are afraid to talk about it.
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*This post contains only my opinion and personal experience, please read the disclaimer for more information.
